I will provide a very watered down version of my experience at the fertility/sperm bank. I have received several inquiries as to what that part of this roller coaster was like.
Here is the summary.
After an initial medical consultation, they handed me a soda can-sized cup and told me it is time for me to provide my deposit. They then led me down this hallway and said that I could use any of the three "specimen rooms." All the rooms were about twice the size of a phone both.
Each room had a different theme.
Room #1. White walls and a large picture of a shirtless man holding a newborn baby. (You should be arrested if you use that room to make your deposit!)
Room #2. The room was covered in abstract chalk drawings of the female figure... for the "artsy" donor.
Room #3. I would call this room the "what you would expect a sperm bank room to be filled with room."
I completed the deposit and dropped it off with the lab tech, who then asked me several questions about my experience.
*I dare anyone in that situation to try and make eye contact with the lab tech while you're answering the questions. It would liken it to trying to keep your eyes open during a sneeze.
Deposit made, and those assets are frozen.
I started to respond to this post and then realized that as your little sister i should probably leave the witty remarks regarding your sperm and P to someone else...that would just be awkward. Some might say as awkward as making eye contact with the sperm bank lab yech after making a deposit :-)
ReplyDeleteGreat post Wes. You answered a lot of my questions as to the real nature of a sperm lab. I now have one new question that I wish you would have asked the technician had it not been so awkward....what type of people us the man holding the baby room? Thanks for the post I needed a good laugh.
ReplyDeletehilarious and uncomfortable always makes for good storytelling.
ReplyDelete